Playing Games with Underwater Welders

I play this game on my phone called Words with Friends. It's a lot like Scrabble, and most of the people I play with are people I actually know. However, sometimes I accept an invitation from someone I don't know, and occasionally, when I spot someone who looks like a better player than I am, I'll challenge that person to a game as a way of sharpening up my skills. 

Words with Friends allows players to "chat" with their opponents, and it's rare that I am willing to engage in a chat on there with someone I don't already know. But once in a while I do. What follows is a conversation which took place between me and a new opponent a few months ago.

Player: Hello! You play so well. How long have you been playing? 

(I'm not that great a player.)

Me: Thank you. It's been about four years. 

Player: Wow, that's such a long time. I just started some days back. Where are you from?
 
Me: The Midwest. You?

Player: I'm from Houston, Texas, but currently at Israel Gaza for peacekeeping. How's the weather over there in the Midwest today?

Me: Peacekeeping mission? What organization do you represent?

Player: I'm a USA Military General currently serving in Gaza Strip and I work for the United Nations. Lovely photo you've got. You look exceptionally beautiful and amazingly gorgeous on your photo.

Funny how this USA Military General wrote as though English was not his first language. 

Three hours later . . .

Player: Hello?

Me: I'm really not much into chatting on here. Thanks, though.

Player: You're welcome. I just find you interesting and nice to talk to. It's been so long since I've had someone to text with. Please, for the sake of friendship, can you text more with me? I really would love to get to know you much more. Are you married or single?

Sadly, that's where our acquaintance ended. Something came over me, some fickle inspiration, and I blocked our chat. Words with Friends has a feature allowing you to do that. I'm sure he was sincere and looking for a long-term relationship. Actually, I don't think that at all. I think he wanted to scam me. The same is probably the case with Felipe.

Felipe: Hello! I must say this because it has been on my mind from the beginning I matched you. First of all, my late wife's name was the same as yours and the smile on your face reminds me of her so much and one other this is that she's also a nurse. And I have been wondering if people in this world are in twos. 

I didn't bother to point out to Felipe that not only was I not smiling in my photo, I was wearing a jacket and blue jeans and sitting in the grass. His late wife being a nurse and sharing my smile weren't the coincidences he was faking them out to be. He must have thought I couldn't see my own picture on the game.

Felipe: My pleasure playing with you! Where are you from please? I'm from Lisbon, Portugal, but I live in New York.

Me: I'm from the Midwest.

Felipe: Okay, that's nice. I have heard a lot about the Midwest, but I have never been there at all. Although I have a colleague that lives there. Have you ever been out of the Midwest, visiting other states or countries? I have traveled to several countries due to my job in engineering and seminars. 

Me: I haven't traveled as much as I'd like, but I hope to travel more in the future. 

Felipe: That's nice. At least you'll have experiences of how other countries and places feels and look like. Are you an outdoor person? I like going out maybe gather with few friends every once in a while. 

I go to bed without responding. The next morning:

Felipe: Believe that you are beautiful and have what it takes to move mountains, and you'll move mountains. Don't allow yourself to be let down by what others say. Get up and do what you can do best. Good morning!

 Me: Thanks, Felipe, all nice thoughts. 

Felipe: You're welcome! Still you have not answered my question. You like being outdoors?

Me: I used to enjoy being outdoors but not as much since I shattered my knee cap in a mountain climbing accident and had to have my leg amputated. You've really brought up painful memories for me, Felipe. 

Felipe: I am so sorry about your leg! I know it'll be uncomfortable for you sometimes. Always make sure you follow the doctor's advice so you don't hurt yourself again. Outdoor activities brings fresh ideas into my everyday life, and it makes me think freely. 

Forget about what you couldn't achieve yesterday, and think of the wonderful things today has for you. Work with all your might towards them to make your tomorrow extraordinarily bright. Good morning!

Me: Good morning.

Felipe: How's your day going? I figured you always play game at midnight. Are you working on night shift?

Me: No, it's just that I usually play at bedtime. My day is going well, thanks.

Felipe: Mine has been busy but going smoothly. Whenever I'm on my lunch break, I take time out of my busy schedule and take a little time to check on you. So, tell me, please, how long have you been a nurse or a doctor?

Me: I'm not a nurse or a doctor. 

Felipe: Oh, pardon me please! When I saw your clothes, I thought your were a nurse. So what are you doing for a living please? I'm a private contractor and an underwater welder. 

Cut and scene. That wasn't the first time someone on Words with Friends told me he was an underwater welder. Next time it will be an underwater welder who's also a "USA Military General" on a peacekeeping mission in the Gaza Strip.  

Ugh.






 

Is it My Fault He Was a Fraud?

I love men, but like unrefrigerated mayo at a Fourth of July picnic, men don't love me back. 

I'm still sorting out an experience where there was enough of what I can only call malevolent relationship weirdness going on that for just a minute, I wondered if it was my fault.  

Was it my fault that after nearly a year of dating a man, he told me something jaw-droppingly "surprising" about himself (no, he wasn't married) followed by his unilateral decision that this issue was too big an obstacle for a continued relationship? And all just one week after encouraging me to be freer with him? 

When he told me all this I cleverly pointed out: "But this is just one week after you encouraged me to be freer with you." 

It seems that when I became freer with him, I became happier with him and we couldn't have that in part because the surprise he'd just shared, aka the bomb he'd just dropped,  might not be conducive to my continued happiness. 

When asked, "Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" he replied, "Because you couldn't have handled it sooner."

Interesting how Jack Nicholson here knew what I couldn't handle when I'd handled much bigger bombs from much better men. 

"What do you want to say to me?" he asked, dipping his head tenderly to one side so that it appeared he really cared.

"I have nothing to say to you," I replied.

"Well, if you did have something to say to me, what would it be?" he coaxed.

I won't quote myself here because my response was lengthy and contained a lot of Fs. 

He smiled and said he understood.  

It would be a huge leap for me to imagine how this man could profess to know what I could or could not deal with much less understand how I felt. For me it had as much to do with the deceit I perceived as the revelation itself.  

And that's where I come in again: Was this somehow my fault?

Maybe it was and maybe this is the reason: Maybe I just happened to attract a man who knew not that his secret was something I couldn't handle, but that it was something I should never have to handle. And instead of being open with it, or better yet, not pursuing me in the first place, he helped himself to almost a year with me under false pretenses.

In short, maybe I'm the reason because I'm the one who just happened to attract a fraud.